Bizarre Night Safari Experience


One of the most absurd zoos I’ve ever been to (only second to the pig-tiger Sriracha Zoo).

Predators sleepily stalled next to their food (who also looked bored and unthreatened). Wild pigs looked so strange, like cut-and-paste pictures of matte black dog bodies with pig nostrils and super slim legs. Their tummies looked oval. Their straight smooth tails wagged for food as they speedily ran after our trams with their tiny toothpick legs.

Then a village of million twins of zebras trotted along. They reminded me of Agent Smiths in The Matrix. As I stared at them, my head started to spin and twirl into their stripe hypnotic patterns and mohawk hair. They showed me their straight yellow teeth and pink gums; their fake eyelashes fanned as their black dolly eyes gleamed with hope. Their butts were very big, tight and round. Suddenly Beyonce’s music vdo came into my mind. Bounce. Bounce. Pop. Pop. Shake. Shake. Hair flip. Booty dance. I didn’t know why. I felt tribal. I shook my head to clear my mind. Then it was the end of the tour. Very surreal. I’m not sure if this was all a dream.



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